Not too long ago, I felt angry all of the time, always ready to put someone in their place if they even looked in my direction in the wrong way or at the wrong time. For anyone who thinks I'm too much to deal with these days, you should feel lucky not to have crossed paths with me a few years ago. I felt out of control. Nothing I did was easy, I was always high strung, I would constantly snap at people for no good reason, and I was alright with that. After all, I had the right to act this way... Didn't I? One thing I learned is that I come from a LOOOOOOOOOOOONG line of over-reactors, but, as most people know, no one is entitled to be like this. I was unhappy with myself and I was taking it out on everyone around me.
Making this discovery was not an easy thing to do. For me to admit fault in myself and my actions was nearly a miracle then, but as I grew up I began to realize that I could not control everything that was happening around me. I had to loosen the reins a bit and allow the people around me to make decisions for themselves, no matter how stupid I thought those decisions might be.
As I let go of everyone else's baggage, I began to let go of some of my own. You would be surpised at how much you miss about your own life when you're so busy worrying about everyone else's. I started a diet and sort of a self discovery. Once I had lost my first 10 lbs or so, I began working with a trainer.
Tamarack Zeppa was my trainer at the time. She took me under her wing and showed me the ropes of training and after sessions, we would sit and chat about the workouts, or just life in general... and the weight kept coming off.
With Tamarack's help, I reached the goal I had been chasing for a long time. At the time, we both thought that meant passing the PREP test, but looking back, I can now tell you that I much surpassed that. I had self control. No one could MAKE me act in a certain way, not even my mother who drove me insane on a daily basis. I always knew how to deal with situations in a pretty calm, cool manner. No more flying off the handle. This is still true today. I always feel better, more in tune with myself when I am into a good fitness regime.
Now my fitness guru is Ange DeFrancesco and she's on the ball when it comes to giving me the push I need to stay on track. She is a really great example of strength. This girl is always rockin' life the way she wants to live it! It's very admirable to see someone who can turn off the haters and crank out one of the best workouts you can imagine. Ange leaves it all out there. As she likes to say, "We don't stop when we're tired, we stop when we're done." She's a shining example of everyday strength and making your own way. No taking the easy way out when she's around, that's for sure! And no one better think it was easy for her to get to where she is in the fitness industry. That's ALL work.
I also think of one of my closest friends, Alicia Dorazio, when I think about true strength. This person has overcome a lot in her life. Her mother passed away when she was still in highschool and she has been fending for herself ever since. I'm sure some people may have doubted that she could do it all on her own back in the day, but she has always worked hard for everything in life and now has a lot to show for it. Her life is truly amazing and I'm sure there are a lot of people who would agree. She has a good job, a wonderful husband and two of the cutest and best kids out there! But to get to where she is now was a fight and I can tell you first hand, she knocked it out!
It doesn't matter how physically strong you might think you are, true strength comes from within. Find yours and roll with it.
Love this one a lot, Ang!
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